betrayal

betrayal

I’m scared. I’m scared of my own love. How it has betrayed me. My own love. Why? I keep asking myself. Why did my love, love someone else more than it loved me. Why such betrayal from my own love. I can’t comprehend it.

My own love led me to believe loving you more was better than loving myself. It led me to believe you were better than me, you were everything and I was not. Why? Why do feel betrayed by you???

My own love fooled me into letting go of what I believed in, led me to distrust my intuition. Why?? My own love, why???

Where does one draw the line if even the love for myself won’t guide me. In my own love’s betrayal I struggle to love you again. What if my hear t forgets to draw the line between loving myself and loving you more.  I’ve felt it before, I’ve heard it before. I feel like I've lost myself. I see myself about to take on the same path that has left my very same loving heart drenched.

Can I do this again??? Can my heart betray me again… will it know the line, that fine line between loving me and loving another more than me… will it know?